Wednesday, March 29, 2006

'ze french

TV Reporter:  So you are protesting for something that the rest of the world aleady has?

Young Frenchman (w/thick accent):  Yes, but 'zis is France !!!

Followed by a pause, a raised fist & then: We cannot let 'ze bastards win !!!

From, The Age

"Prime Minister Dominique de Villepin has staked his reputation, and possibly his job, on a measure that aims to cut rampant youth unemployment with two-year contracts that enable employers to sidestep rigid French labour laws and fire young workers without reason."

Student: "We don't want the Anglo-Saxon economic model here."

ilizarov parade

how high's the water mamma
2 ft high & risin' . . .

File photo. Not actual parade participants

The sun is out after 4 days of grey, had good bbq for lunch, ate outside, had a root beer, good dr's appointment, the leg grows

Usually when I go to the "Arthur Gold Fracture Clinic" at County Harbor Medical Center there are 1-2 people with cages on. Today was a parade of past, present & future cage wearers. Here's a rundown, some you've met before:

34 yr old male - In the cage since June 2005. His cargo van was clipped from behind on an overpass and spun out of control. He was ejected from the van & fell 30 ft.

25 yr old female - Currently cageless. In & out of cages for three yrs. She has brittle bones and when they break they break in mulitple places. She broke her right leg and just as she was almost healed she fell and broke the other leg. So, as soon as the cage came off one leg it was slapped on the other

27 yr old male - Currently cageless. Wore a cage for 7 months, july 2005 through january 2006. Spent 8 months at the hospital. Part of his car suspension "dropped out" while he was driving and he lost control & hit a tree. When the fire fighters cut him out of the car his pelvis was still in the driver's seat facing foward but his legs were lying across the passenger seat. Additional injuries include a broken pelvis. His knee is locked at 15 degrees & he is going to have to have the knee reconstructed

40 yr old male - Has been in the cage for 14 months. Cause of fracture unknown. Mode of transportation: skateboard. He sits on his shortboard and pushed with his good leg and hands. He must prefer it to a chair because I heard the nurse offering him one and the doctors would write him a perscription for one if he asked

50 year old man - Cageless and walking without a boot or walking cast. Pronounced limp. Knee locked @ 20 degrees. Range of motion may not improve, physical therapy to continue. Slight scaring

35 yr old man - Three weeks out of the cage. Walks with one crutch & wears a boot.

33 yr old female - Cageless. Has been wearing a boot for 5 months.

Monday, March 27, 2006

swine genetics

The question isn't whether to use Genepacker sows but why would you use anything but.

"Genepacker females are heavy milkers. Our piglet size coming out of our farrowing house has been excellent, while maintaining consistency. I’m very impressed with the tremendous efficiency Genepacker females provide."
-Scott Taylor, Sow Production Manager, Prestage Farms

"We’ve been happy with Genepackers. They have a calm temperament and produce milk efficiently in the farrowing house, which allows us to wean heavier, faster growing pigs. The weaning weights produced by Genepackers are about 6% more than weaning weights at farms with other genetics.

The Genepacker’s calm temperament and ability to come into farrowing houses with a good level of back fat make them easy to manage and feed. The Genepacker’s ability to maintain good sow condition with less feed means we have excellent litter performance and a hardier female in a more profitable barn."
-Darcy Pauls, Production / Technical Manager, Puratone

For more on swine genetics

'Over the Edge' come to life

In the tradition of Ghandi, Martin Luther King Jr. & Cesar Chavez the demonstrators threw eggs at law enforcement officers.

Who brings eggs to an immigration rally !?

Point of confusion: the demonstrators were rallying in support of immigrant rights in the U.S. but they were chanting, "Mexico! Mexico!"

Sunday, March 26, 2006

Pursuing healthier bacon through biotech

monsanto at it again

what's your worm dna doing in my pig!!

progress through pain

PT appointment yesterday

The therapist made me put a ball between my legs and play catch with her.

Later, "Did you take any pain medicine today?"

Just as I was about to answer she bent my toes which have been curled for about 5 months, it hurt, I screamed. "I'm not taking pain medicine anymore."

"Oh sorry, did that hurt?"

"That's OK it's gotta be done."

Left my apt. @ 8:45 am
Got picked up @ 10:45 am

Friday, March 24, 2006

I can feel the devil walking next to me

All I wanted was the lyrics to one night in Bankok & this is what came up from (cute pun). Mythai bills itself as the source for "travel to thailand for professionals & familes."

Nothing says family entertainment like a soapy massage.

A soapy massage is basically a bath followed by a unique massage where the girl puts you on an air mattress and throws hot soapy water on you and then treats you like a slip and slide and massages you.

In some Go Go Bars in Bangkok and Pattaya, they have "short time" rooms at the bars for customers that want to enjoy the dancers more intimately. I believe this is especially critical for customers who want to have sex with a girl but don't want to be "seen" outside of the bar with another women (e.g. husbands).

Eden Club located of a side street on Sukhumvit (7/1). It is a massage place where it is mandatory that you take 2 girls upstairs with you. There are mirrors on the ceilings, the girls often taken toys with them upstairs and anything goes. Couples are most certainly welcome, although if you bring a female friend that means that you will be going upstairs with at least 3 women.

We keep this brief because this is only a small part of what Thailand has to offer, although it is a large part of the web traffic on Thailand
! Hahaha


NPR factoids
More to the Point

the cost of jet fuel has doubled in the past year

the military builds vehicles that are rated, "gallons per mile" vs. "miles per gallon"

the airforce buys 43% of all energy produced via wind power - is that to make up for fosil fuel consumption !?

they're also, "into landfill gases". Landfill gases are great, argghh methane, mad max, barter town, life for killin' a pig, "not shit! energgggggyy!"

good lord - planes flying on coal; solid to gaseous, gaseous to liquid - fill 'er up! that's gotta be great for the enviro

Thursday, March 23, 2006

special blonde wanted

I really hope no one answers this add. The "we" are obviously quite off and not fit to raise a blonde or any other type of child.

Someone should explain to them that a blonde parent does not neccesarily beget a blonde child.

They have quite a list of requisites (not a drop of asian blood please) and the facility sounds first rate! "Come on, Come on, get in here. Yes, yes, lay down, quickly, quickly, now come on. Do you know how many eggs I have to harvest today!"

Reply to:
Date: 2006-03-21, 11:27PM PST

We are seeking a rather unusual egg donor. She must be a blonde Latina. It is preferred that both of her parents and any siblings also be blonde or as close to blonde as possible. She need not have entirely Latina looks, but it is important to us that she be a true Latina on both sides of her family (i.e. she should have as much Latino ancestry as possible, and no Middle Eastern, African, or Asian ancestry). She must have ACT scores of at least 32 or combined SAT scores of at least 1400. She should be 5'8" or taller and be height-weight proportional. She should come from a healthy family background, and be entirely healthy herself. She must be between 21 and 33 years old.

She must be able to sign a contract immediately and travel to Miami as soon as possible to begin an egg donor cycle, and to remain there for approximately the next five weeks. All expenses will be covered. We must stress that we do not wish to meet the donor, nor to know the donor's last name: the process will be entirely anonymous on both sides. The donor will be working with a large clinic that handles a high volume of donor cycles and does not give a great deal of personalized attention, so she must be capable of functioning with a high degree of independence. Thus, donors with a serious profession, who have shown themselves capable of maintaining such a profession, will be preferred. Married donors with at least one child will also be preferred. Donors from large families will also be preferred, as evidence of fertility and genetic hair color. Finally, donors who have done at least one previous donation cycle will be preferred.

If you believe you are such a person, please write briefly and tell us why. You must also email a photo to be considered.

* Job location is Miami
* Compensation: $20,000. (half paid on signing the contract)

dialing for jesus

Ring, ring, ring

Hello . . .hello

If you'd like to hear about a brand new church in our area press the one button.

Oh man I can't believe this. Alright I'll see what's behind the one button.

I pressed one. No sound.

Hello, Hello? I'm looking for jesus.

Still no answer. I hung up apparently god was busy.

feelings of abandonment

"I didn't do it. It was that cry baby Mcartney."

bovine & man

Monday, March 20, 2006

One from the achives

I believe enough time has passed:

Date: Fri, 3 Oct 2003 10:38:18 -0700 (PDT)

man I am still recovering from all the booze on wen night - I came home
after having to pick my buddy up for the umpteenth time - he kept falling
down he was so drunk - he cracked his face and his skull -

anyway I got sick in my kitchen and passed out on the floor with the water running
- all the chote unfortuantely clogged the sink - I woke up god knows when to
comotion outside - then I realized I was laying in standing water -

it turns out the apt. below me got completely flooded out - like the
cieling and wall sheet rock came down - I of course went into oh sh*& mode and
tried to figure out what to do - I couldn't find my glasses so I
cleaned up what I could and passed out - I called into work because I was so hung

all day I kept expecting a call from the manager - when it finally
came - he and the plummers were looking for a leak in the wall - I played
dumb and didn't say anything - all they said was there would be water all over
the place if it was in here -

without a doubt the largest catastrophy my drinking has ever created - It made
me rexamine my substance abuse policy well . . . until my neighbor came
over to smoke - then I watched Autofoucs - which takes a piece of your soul - william defoe is a scary man - plus it was overcast in LA - so the
seasonal depression kicked in - all and all I'm glad I will never have to
relive that day

paper the town

leaflet madness - "johnson! Get me air com! let's drop a bunch of paper on 'em !!

somehow single pornographic magazine sheets found their way into the stacks of leaflets. Scenes depicted on the offensive leaflets included beastiality & bondage. An investigation is on going.

"just drop 'em in the slot here. we'll bury gerry in paper !!!"

from spx:

we'll call a leaflet drop in on ourselves. stand there in the middle of it playing golf or mixing martini's, pretending nothing unusual is happening. ooof, could you imaginge a tumbling bundle not opening and getting hit in the chest with it!

this takes paperwork to a new level.

the scene: 6 secretaries at old navy surplus desks, 6 in a line, in the dunes. everything is peaceful. then the work whistle shrills (dub over). then three f-16's scream overhead and dump paperwork on the secretaires. they process whatever is on their desk.

Friday, March 17, 2006

Rio Bravo

Trying to track down the Rio Bravo, soundtrack . . .

"Dean Martin used women as cue cards during his show."


"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver." - Jack Handy

Thursday, March 16, 2006

make mine a camel


enclosed with my payment:

To whom it may concern:

How can you issue a parking citation for street cleaning, when there was no street cleaning done !?

My motorcycle can not block a street cleaner that is not present.

Forty seven dollars is an outrageous ticket for this offense. Do you really think working class people can afford a $47 hit, when they are having trouble making ends meet? It would take someone making the federal minimum wage over 9 hrs to pay this citation. That is outrageous and the city of Santa Monica should be ashamed !

These tickets are not in an effort to insure the streets can be cleaned. They are a source of revenue for the city. How much money does Santa Monica collect annually in parking tickets? How many tickets did it take to pay for your $54 million dollar library?

Please foward my complaint to the appropriate party. I look foward to your response.


No response was ever received. My check was cashed.

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Women from Indonesia's elite presidential security squad perform a drill in Jakarta to mark the 60th anniversary of the squad's formation.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Certificate of Birth

Should it be that easy !?

I gave out a mental groan when I realized I didn't have an original copy of my Certificate of Birth and that I was going to have to track one down. I got the phone number to the Town Clerk's office in Concord, MA (Yes that's right concord/lexington, minutemen, the shot heard around the world, mr. thoureau's cabin, all that great birth of a nation stuff)and told the voice on the other end what I needed.

Hi, I need to get a copy of my birth certificate.

OK, It's 15 dollars.
Will you be picking it up?

No, I live out of state & I'm disabled. I'll probably have a relative pick it up for me.

OK, we'll have it waiting for them.
What is your name, let me look it up and make sure we have it.

Carl M. Ferry

OK, we have it.

And that'll be a certified copy.

Yes, with the raised seal, (mumble) you can take it and . . .

Great, Thanks.

You're welcome.


I called my aunt & uncle and asked them to pick up the certificate, which they did today without any problem. Should it be that easy to get a certified copy of a birth certificate!? I'm not paranoid about identity theft but I don't need a news expose to show me how easy it is. The birth certificate is the mother of all documents. Other documents are made from it. Starting with the social security department(for which I needed the cert.) which begets liscenses, passports etc.

But what do you show to proove you and the name on the certificate are the same person?

Come to think of it there really is nothing to connect me to the certificate besides a bunch of documents that were generated based on this sheet of paper which has nary a picture or print. Where are the dam foot and handprints!

On tothe document itself:

I finally have the affirmation I've been seeking. I am in fact, according to line 3 a male. Sheww - good I've been buying the right underware and checking the right box all these years. I am a little concerned about what's missing from the document. Line 3 has additional questions, "Color and if Twin". No color was filled in, though if I could choose it would say purple and there is no indication if I was a twin or not. Jesus I could have a brother or sister running around that I don't even know.

Interestingly, line seven of the certificate lists the father's occupation. Thankfully the line read U.S. Navy & not exotic dancer or petty thief

Monday, March 13, 2006

Green Gold

Green Gold
The return of absinthe
By Jack Turner
The New Yorker - 3/13/06

Toulouse-Lautrec went so far as to teach his pet cormorant to drink it. He carried his own dose in a hollowed-out cane and took it "dilutted" with cognac, a combination he dubbed "the Earthquake."

A combination of hysteria ansd quasi scientific claims turned popular opinion against absinthe.

In 1912, the dept. of agriculture, having decided that absinthe was "one of the worst enemies of man," issued a ban that remains in force to this day.

In March, 1915, fearful of being overrun by a more vigorous nation, the French Chamber of Deputies voted to rid the country of teh debilitating effects of endemic absinthism. "The absinthe drinker is content to crouch before the stalwart, honest, beer bred Teuton."

. . . ruinously expensive drink - a vintage bottle typically sells for more than three thousand dollars.

. . . the idea that absinthe should taste bitter is a misconception of the modern absinthe revival.

. . . pre-ban absinthe contained practically no thujone.

REBUILT: the human body shop

Live life each day!!

Can't wait to see this show

Check out a preview

Check out video stories

I cried which was good.

Sunday, March 12, 2006

protective cloth permeable helmet !?

"go up to the barn and fetch grandpa's chem gear"

Ilizarov and External Fixator wearer's support group


The Ilizarov and External Fixator wearer's support group ( exists to help those people undergoing any form of orthopaedic treatments utilising external fixation. This includes Ilizarov frames, Taylor Spatial frames, Orthofix and the like.

I have applied & am awaiting the moderator's approval, but what henious acts were commited that neccesitated a registry. I imagine the ilizarov community is farely small (Please if anyone has the numbers send them) and there aren't to many people cruisin' for info on the cage, so what gives ?


Ron Kovic Reborn

Tim Gilmer, New Mobility
June 20, 2003

. . . Kovic was not always this eloquent. His voice has been shaped by war, its destructive aftermath and decades of fearless commitment to protesting governmental policies that support war. To Kovic, war is not an abstraction, not a neatly packaged television graphic -- The War with Saddam -- not a map bristling with colored pins. It's blood-and-guts reality, and he owns it. He's a streetwise activist who speaks like a polished politician -- the cadence, the repetition, the dramatic diction, streams of words pouring forth, demanding attention: "I think this policy is so wrong, and so misguided, and I may be one of the few Americans saying that right now, but I believe strongly in what I'm saying, and I'll say it today, even on this day -- [the day Baghdad fell]. This is a terribly misguided policy that will backfire, this will not stand, this will not work, this will work only against us. This will not lead us to peace and this will not lead us to justice, and this will not lead us to a safer world but a more dangerous world, a more dangerous and unstable Middle East. I think this is going to hurt America."

Born on the 4th of July, is required reading

Saturday, March 11, 2006

delouse twice daily

that's putting a lot of faith in a suit that's prone to crotch blow outs - "argghhh slap some tape on it ya sissy & hit the decon tent."

rekost & baconost

for this i'll forgive the danes for their outrageous depictions of the prophet

CA prop 215

Seems simple enough !? it seems to me that there are very few issues where upon examination the correct path is not apparent

Drains in my back
They took some back muscle to make my "fake" leg. The drains, well, they drain liquid and chunky stuff (medical term) from the donor site.

SECTION 1. Section 11362.5 is added to the Health and Safety Code, to read:
11362.5. (a) This section shall be known and may be cited as the Compassionate Use Act of 1996.
(b)(1) The people of the State of California hereby find and declare that the purposes of the Compassionate Use Act of 1996 are as follows:

(A) To ensure that seriously ill Californians have the right to obtain and use marijuana for medical purposes where that medical use is deemed appropriate and has been recommended by a physician who has determined that the person's health would benefit from the use of marijuana in the treatment of cancer, anorexia, AIDS, chronic pain, spasticity, glaucoma, arthritis, migraine, or any other illness for which marijuana provides relief.
(B) To ensure that patients and their primary caregivers who obtain and use marijuana for medical purposes upon the recommendation of a physician are not subject to criminal prosecution or sanction.
(C) To encourage the federal and state governments to implement a plan to provide for the safe and affordable distribution of marijuana to all patients in medical need of marijuana.

Friday, March 10, 2006

As a skeletally mature individual . . .

have to wear it 20 min. a day, ultrasound (1/3 as powerful as the baby finder) promotes bone growth

my friends at the park

EXOGEN 2000+™, EXOGEN 3000™ or Sonic Accelerated Fracture Healing System (SAFHS™) is indicated for the non-invasive treatment of established nonunions excluding skull and vertebra.

In addition, the EXOGEN 2000+, EXOGEN 3000 or Sonic Accelerated Fracture Healing System (SAFHS) is indicated for accelerating the time to a healed fracture for fresh, closed, posteriorly displaced distal radius fractures and fresh, closed or Grade I open tibial diaphysis fractures in skeletally mature individuals when these fractures are orthopedically managed by closed reduction and cast immobilization.

check out the cool video


oooooo boy gimme some 'a dat hooch !!!

the bastards !!! Fuck you Buck Crenshaw !!!

"If you made a gallon of whiskey, they made $11 in tax on it...How did they expect you to pay $11 a gallon when you only sold it for $4 dollars a gallon?" --Junior Johnson

Gandhi had a stand on beastiality !?

Deputy fire chief faces indecency charge

The Arizona Republic
Mar. 7, 2006 10:17 AM Leroy Donald Johnson was caught this weekend in a barn with his pants down, literally, according to a sheriff's office report.

"You caught me ... I tried to (expletive) your sheep," Johnson told his neighbor, according to the report.

But the Mesa Fire Department deputy fire chief changed his story when a sheriff's deputy arrived on his doorstep minutes later, denying anything happened.

Johnson, 52, was jailed on suspicion of disorderly conduct and criminal trespassing after the neighbor told investigators he found Johnson, unzipped and holding a sheep down on its side.

That's the sanitized version. The Maricopa County Sheriff's Office report released Monday night is a little more graphic.

Johnson's neighbor told sheriff's deputies he was called home Saturday afternoon when his 13-year-old daughter saw Johnson drag one of their sheep into a barn.

The teenager said Johnson had first knocked on the front and back door of the home in the 1200 block of East Catclaw Street, in a county island in Gilbert, before grabbing the small gray lamb, records showed.

One of the deputies noted that Johnson had bloodshot eyes and smelled of alcohol, and neighbors who confronted him said he admitted everything.

According to the deputy's report, "(The owner) took me into the back yard and showed me where he and (neighbor) pulled up. He took me through the corral gate and I saw the victim for the first time. She was a small gray lamb about three feet tall and four feet long."

The men then told the deputy they walked over to the small barn, opened the door and "saw Leroy holding the lamb down on its side in the hay with his pants down trying to have sex with it. That's when he made the statement about (expletive) the lamb."

The men said Johnson stood up and zipped up his pants.

"The sheep ran out of the barn at that point," the report says.

Johnson apologized, according to the report, and said he'd had "too much to drink."

The Mesa Fire Department placed Johnson, on paid leave Monday pending an internal investigation. Johnson, deputy chief of technical services, has been with the Mesa Fire Department for nearly 26 years.

Assistant Fire Chief Mary Cameli said Johnson has been an "exemplary" employee with a spotless personnel record.

"We were all very surprised by this," Cameli added.

Johnson did not return a call for comment Monday.

When confronted by a deputy at his home, Johnson initially denied the incident, saying he had been at his neighbor's house to talk about annexation.

Johnson said he went into the barn after hearing noises. The deputy said to him, "I believe something more than that happened," and offered help.

Johnson responded, "I probably do need some help, but I don't know if this is the time or place for it," according to the report.

When asked how the animal got into the barn, Johnson said, "I'm not going there," then asked if he was going to be arrested and demanded to know his legal options.

He continued to deny that anything happened in the barn and was arrested.

"I think it's disgusting," Sheriff Joe Arpaio said. "I think of Gandhi who said you judge the morality of a country by the way they treat their animals. . . . I do look at (bestiality) as some type of animal cruelty."

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

faT tiRe

from my architect friend

hahaha, i just got barked at by the office manager. she saw me making the coffee this morning. HEY, don't stare over the master's shoulder as he works! you won't be pleased!!
she accusingly say "you! you're the culprit!" and goes on to say how her and the office assitant have been wondering why we're tearing through coffee grounds and when they dump the used filter we its overflowing with grounds.
My reply, "have you had my coffee?! It'll leave you won't want any more!!!" which is obviously a double meaning reply. but the chief boss has complemented my coffee multiple times, and he signs the checks. My technique (which is adopted and modified from working in an office in Paris) of overloading the filter, then tamping down the grounds into a firm 75% compaction, then doing so with another surface layer.
the results are semi psychotropic very oily cup of perfect coffee.
i staved her off and continued the offense, and now as i type, i can hear the coffee pot groaning and straining, trying to get water through the grounds !!!!

Thinking of having a baby ?

A normal Tuesday in the Niessen household:

Daddy Pat suddenly wakes up on the couch at 2am Tuesday morning. As he
stands up and makes his way to the bedroom to enjoy the last couple of
hours of sleep in his actual bed, he feels a grumbling..rumbling of
discontent in his stomach. Thinking nothing of it, he takes a few more
steps and realizes that things in his digestive tract are amiss. He the darkness, without the aid of his glasses to the
bathroom. There in the dark he spews forth the contents of his
stomach...only some of which make it into the toilet. He rinses his
mouth, washes his beard and foolishly turns on the light. Mistake. In
the darkness he managed to hit 3 of the four wall of the bathroom with
splatter...not to mention his own jeans. Disgusting. He spends the
next 30 minutes cleaning up his own expunged bile and manages to go
back to bed and eventually fall asleep, still slightly reeking of

He awakens a few hours later, still feeling bad but no longer
nauseous. The acidic taste in his mouth and raw throat tell him that
he's staying home this day. The morning proceeds fairly uneventfully,
other than the first sip of coffee nearly throwing him into a round of
dry heaves, so coffee is out. He plays with his daughter for a few
hours and eventually rouses his wife from her slumber. Food. He needs
food. Cooking is out. He feels like crap and wants to be waited on. A
destination is decided and they prepare to leave the house. The baby
is gathered, the diaper bag is prepared. Last thing to do is shut the
sliding glass door. Suddenly his wife screams: "KOBI, NO! GET OUTSIDE!
NOT IN THE HOUSE!" He looks down...his dog is coughing. Heaving.
"KOBI!" he yells, "GO OUTSIDE!" But he doesn't...the dog moves further
into the house, still heaving. "KOBI! GET -" and it comes. A mound of
chewed grass and yellow canine bile. Right there on the kitchen floor.
His wife covers her mouth and mutters "oh dear god..."

"Take the baby," he says. "I'll clean it up. It's just grass." It is
just grass....grass covered in yellow, warm pungent mucus. It's not
even 11:00a.

Lunch goes by without incident. The sour stomach does not return, and
everyone keeps the food in their stomach. The afternoon is spent on an
obligatory trip to Target where he escapes buying only new windshield
wipers and a new ball for his daughter to play with. They return home
and spend the day relaxing and playing with their baby. As the
afternoon wears on, their daughter begins to get restless. It's time
for a nap. Her mother decides that she needs a bottle before she goes

"But honey," Daddy Pat says "she's been eating all day. I think she's

"No," Mommy says "she usually has a bottle before her afternoon nap.
I'm trying to keep her on her schedule." Bottle it is. Mommy knows

They sit. Daddy Pat and baby, lounging in the kitchen as she drinks
her new 8 oz. bottle, double the size of the bottles she had just a
few days before. And she drinks, pausing occasionally to giggle at the
dog, but always returning to her bottle. When she finishes, she drops
the bottle on the floor and starts babbling.

"OK's time for your nap." Still sitting he places her on his
shoulder and begins to rise. She burps, and suddenly his arm is wet
and warm. And his shoulder...and it continues down his back, settling
in his asscrack. "Honey!" he says. "A little help. She spit up on me."
He holds her away from his body. She's giggling. "Ha. Very funny," he
thinks. She opens her mouth....and out shoots a geyser of formula, the
arc extending at least 2 feet from her body - a scene straight out of
Stand By Me. It barely misses Daddy Pat, but covers the chair and the
kitchen floor in regurgitated baby formula, the puddle nearing 4 feet
in diameter. "Honey," he says, "I think she was full."


Had to cruise over to county today because the employment dept. somehow thinks I am no longer disabled. The 30 pound metal cage on my leg says otherwise.

more classic lines from county today:

1) "When was the last time I got my pussy eat !! When was the last time I got my pussy eat !!" "My nickname is psycho bitch !!"

2) Hispanic man in a cowboy hat & dark glasses looks my leg over as I wheel by and cackles, "Pray" I turn to look at him the "Pray" not having registered. He's quite amused, belly shaking he says it again "Pray" and nods his head

3) Via the PA: "Labotomy Guiermo 215. Labotomy Guiermo 215" Now I'm not certain
but I think drilling holes in the human skull has gone out of favor, so somone named their child Labotomy; unless of course I misheard plabotomy for labotomy

Heard another great cage tale today. The guy has been in the cage since june 05. Apparently, the van he was driving was clipped from behind and sent into a spin while he was driving on an elevated freeway. He was ejected from the van and fell 35 feet off the free way. When he came to, there was an EMT shouting at him from above, "Why did you jump !?"

Left Apt @ 6 AM
Finised paperwork @ 9:10 AM
Had to wait until 11 AM for my prearranged ride

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

hilarious rant

Sunday, December 11, 2005

Dear anything with a penis.
Current mood: cynical

Stop taking pictures of your dick and then sending them to me, or making it your main picture, or just being an all-around sick in the head mother fucker.
Do you think that looking at a picture of your teenieweenie is going to make me all hot and bothered and I'm going to haul my ass over to Wisconsin/Ohio/South Dakota/whereeverthefuck just to stick it in one of my orifices? YOU MUST HAVE BEEN MISTAKEN, SIR. I'm not going to have sex with a guy who is so desperate and fucked up that he has to take pictures of his genitals and send it to underage girls on myspace who live 8 states away.

This shit is getting ridiculous.

Now, if you're a hot chick with nice boobs, you can send me pictures of them.
But I'm just gonna look at them and smile, because I don't have sex with whores either.



January 15, 2006; NYTIMES

Shutting Themselves In

One morning when he was 15, Takeshi shut the door to his bedroom, and for the next four years he did not come out. He didn't go to school. He didn't have a job. He didn't have friends. Month after month, he spent 23 hours a day in a room no bigger than a king-size mattress, where he ate dumplings, rice and other leftovers that his mother had cooked, watched TV game shows and listened to Radiohead and Nirvana. "Anything," he said, "that was dark and sounded desperate." . . .

Like Takeshi and Shuichi, Y.S. suffered from a problem known in Japan as hikikomori, which translates as "withdrawal" and refers to a person sequestered in his room for six months or longer with no social life beyond his home. (The word is a noun that describes both the problem and the person suffering from it and is also an adjective, like "alcoholic.") Some hikikomori do occasionally emerge from their rooms for meals with their parents, late-night runs to convenience stores or, in Takeshi's case, once-a-month trips to buy CD's. And though female hikikomori exist and may be undercounted, experts estimate that about 80 percent of the hikikomori are male, some as young as 13 or 14 and some who live in their rooms for 15 years or more.

Sunday, March 05, 2006

Project Grizzly

Not to be confussed with, Grizzly Man.

Troy Hurtubise is the man. Check it out. The most fun you'll have this year.

From Wikapedia:

Seven years and $150,000 later, Hurtubise had worked his way up the Mark VI, the suit he believed could protect him from a grizzly. In order to test it, Hurtubise consulted with professors of physics and asked them how to simulate a bear attack. The entire experience was recorded as a National Film Board documentary and called Project Grizzly, with many memorable scenes in which Hurtubise tested the capabilities of the suit using himself as the guinea pig.

Hurtubise approached a tall, heavy biker and his colleagues, and paid them to attack him while wearing the suit, with baseball bats, splitting mauls, and wooden two by fours. The suit survived, as did Hurtubise, while the weapons were reduced to splinters. Other tests included an impact by a swinging 300-pound log, a feat that the Ripley's Believe It or Not television program later attempted with a BMW, as well as tossing him down the side of an escarpment.

Saturday, March 04, 2006


Land sale plan tilted in Northwest's favor

WASHINGTON --More than a quarter of the $800 million the Bush administration plans to raise by selling national forest would benefit rural schools in Oregon and Washington, though just 6 percent of the sales would occur in those forest-rich states.

Why in the richest nation on earth is there a need to sell public lands? Isn't it enough that logging and mineral rights are often leased at below market prices? Set aside the question of "should", why wouldn't the revenue generated by forest sales stay with in the region?

I heard it's bad

Re: Irvine Welsh's Trainspotting

from wikapedia

"The film was also a massive worldwide success. U.S. Sen. Bob Dole decried its moral depravity and glorification of drug use during the 1996 presidential campaign, although he admitted that he had not actually seen the film (or, presumably, read the book)."

read trainspotting & the follow up porno

Friday, March 03, 2006

sat outside a tatoo/piercing parlor yesterday and heckled the people going in

"you think you're hard core!? pussy!"

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Calamari anyone?

Giant squid grabs London audience
By Rebecca Morelle
BBC News science reporter

One of the biggest and most complete giant squids ever found is on display at London's Natural History Museum.

Measuring a monstrous 8.62m (28ft), the animal was caught off the coast of the Falkland Islands by a trawler.

Researchers at the museum undertook a painstaking process to preserve the giant creature, which is now on show in a 9m- (30ft-) long glass tank.

Giant squid, once thought to be sea serpents, are very rarely seen and live at depths of 200-1,000m (650-3,300ft).

They can weigh up to a 1,000kg; the largest ever spotted measured a vast 18.5m and was found in 1880 off Island Bay in New Zealand.

"Most giant squid tend to be washed up dead on beaches, or retrieved from the stomach of sperm whales, so they tend to be in quite poor condition," explained Jon Ablett, the mollusc curator at the Natural History Museum who led preservation efforts.

As a result, finding such a large, complete specimen was something of a rarity, he said.

Archie the squid

The team nicknamed the creature Archie, after its Latin name Architeuthis dux , but it may have to revise this after finding out that the squid is probably female.

Scientists admit they know little about the largest of the squid
It took several months to prepare the squid for display.

"The first stage was to defrost it; that took about four days. The problem was the mantle - the body - is very thick and the tentacles very narrow, so we had to try to thaw the thick mantle without the tentacles rotting," Mr Ablett told the BBC News website.

The scientists did this by bathing the mantle in water, whilst covering the tentacles in ice packs, after which they injected the squid with a formol-saline solution to prevent it from rotting.

The team then needed to find someone to build a glass tank which could not only hold the huge creature, but could leave the squid accessible for future scientific research, and they decided to draw upon the knowledge of an artist famed for displaying preserved dead animals.

"We contacted Damien Hirst's group after seeing their animals preserved in formalin. They put us in touch with a company who could make these tanks," explained Mr Ablett.

The squid now resides in a glass tank, filled to the brim with preservative solution, and is one of 22 million specimens that can be seen as part of the behind-the-scenes Darwin Centre tour of the Natural History Museum.
Story from BBC NEWS:

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

On vacation !?

Leg update:

Went for a leg appointment today but my doctor was on vacation. The physician's assistant & the resident did their best. I'm pill free now; no narcotics, no antibiotics, no anticoagulant, no stool softner, nothing. Also, no infection, no open wounds and I can straighten my knee. Next step is the ankle/foot. I can lift my foot up a little but can't push down. My big toe is still sleepy. I can feel 'em but he doesn't move. 'suspect he's still a little pissed that he was skewered for three months. PT starts on 3/17; bring on the pain.

Saw an old roomate in the waiting area. He speaks as much english as I do spanish so we manage to communicate. Nice guy, he manages to drive himself with the cage on. Wierd story surrounding his leg. About 20 years ago he severly broke his leg they repaired his leg and he went on his way. Then about a year ago he was walking with his little girl and his leg just started bleeding so he landed in the cage which means they must have had to cut some bone out and now they are growing it.

I went without a wrap on the cage today; lots of stares and questions.

"I know that hurts!!"


"Grandma that man has bolts going through his leg. Look they go form one side to the other." "Shhhh"

"I want me a harley." Over & over from the paratransit gal

But how much longer, how much longer do you have to "wear" the cage. The last time I saw the doc(Feb)he said 10 to 12 more months.

I go back in a month. Cranking the cage 3 times(3/4 of a mm)per day.

I'm going to time my appointments from here out:

Left the house @ 6:30 AM
Finished Apt. @ 10:15
Had to wait until 12:30 for my prescheduled ride