Kids Write the Funniest Things

Here is a sampling of my students' work.

Vocabulary Sentences
The assignment is to write a sentence of at least five words with the highlighted vocabulary word.

Vomit is very gross.

Jim dog die miss.

I catch cold because I play cold places.

I'm bleed the tissue is wife.

The cucumber is banana better.

I seem my sister pig.

people hate to the government so they throw the egges.

I'm the mouth catch.

dress a person('s) hide.

teach the young idea how to shoot.

I wonder why hit me. (?)

god is meaning not dieing and create world

I ate the paper But not deliouse

I am wonderful person.

I touch the rock it is flufy

I want bigger donuts because donuts are very delicious.

The sissors (scissors)is a little bit scared.

Since 1997 I was boring.

I don't have dream.

I would buy a lion.

I not used pencil.

The ink smells not good.

Diary Entries
The assignment is to write a diary entry that is five sentences long. Each sentence should be at least five words long.

School Trick (Trip)
I prepared many clothes.

The day when the Big Mom is sick plentifully.

I walk the streets.
And I have headache.
After 20 minutes I'm not headache.
I tell my mom.

Expressions
The students are given a sample expression and asked to write similar expressions.

Example: My finger is bleeding

My penis is bleeding.

Example: Here drink this milk.

Here drink this penis water. (pee)

Photo Backlog

Here are my latest photo albums from Korea.


Return to Gyeryong-San National Park


Hiking & Around Town


The Little Rascals


Chuseok 2009


Around Cheongju


The DMZ


Aunt Martha's Visit


Lunch at Deacheon Beach


Richard & Lindsay's last days

You're going the wrong way!

Pig Farmer Defects, would have been my title.

N.K. says S. Korean man defected across border
-The Korean Herald, 10/27/09

North Korea said Tuesday a 30-year-old South Korean man has defected by crossing the heavily guarded land border between the two countries, Yonhap News said.

The man, identified as Kang Dong-lim, crossed the eastern military demarcation line on Monday, the North's official Korean Central News Agency (KCNA) said in a report monitored in Seoul.

South Korea's Joint Chiefs of Staff said it was checking on the report.

"He is now under the warm care of a relevant organ," the KCNA report said, adding Kang "is pleased with the accomplishment of his desire for defection."

According to the report, Kang raised pigs on a farm in South Korea's southwestern region after quitting his job at a Samsung-affiliated semiconductor company.

"During the military service he made several attempts for defection with his longing for the northern half of Korea, but in vain," it said. South Korea runs a conscription.

A 45-year-old South Korean man made it into the communist neighbor through the border between North Korea and China in 2007 but was expelled for reasons yet to be identified.

Last month, a 54-year-old man received a suspended prison term in South Korea for trying to defect to Pyongyang through a North Korean embassy earlier this year.

Can someone please translate, under the care of a relevant organ for me.

Why on Earth would someone defect to North Korea? No one was trying to get into the USSR (Save Gregory Hines and The White Album era Beatles) or East Germany.

SOKO NOKO Factoid

"Last year, $73.35 million worth of sand, $14,93 million of pine mushrooms and $25.1 million of anthracite were imported (to South Korea) from North Korea. Sand was the largest imported item . . ."-The Korean Herald, 10/27/09

That's a a lot of sand.

Sports Roundup

Pigskin

I truly wonder if London, will get an NFL franchise before Los Angeles. The NFL, seems far more interested in having a team in England than the second largest media market in the Untied States. Patriots' owner Bob Kraft is a big proponent of a London franchise.

“I really believe it’d be the right thing to do sometime in the next decade. There should be a franchise here. We’ve had great suppport here and in Germany, so we look forward and see what happens.” -Bob Kraft, Boston Herald, 10/24/09

I'm wondering about the logistics.

What conference and division will the team be in?

How many west coast games will they play?

How many west coast teams will have to travel to London? London is seven hours ahead of the west coast.

How with playoff game logistics be handled?

Will schedules be arranged so that teams' bye weeks will occur after they play in London?

Will the team be called the London/England Monarchs? The Monarchs folded in 1998. Their average home attendance in their final season was 5,944. Of course the Monarchs were part feeder league and not the NFL.

Germany which had five teams in, The World League & NFL Europe (Cologne Centurions 2004–2007, Berlin Thunder 1999–2007, Frankfurt Galaxy 1991–2007, Hamburg Sea Devils 2005–2007, & Rhein Fire 1995–2007) would seem a more logical home the first NFL team in Europe. Actually, another North American country, say Canada or Mexico makes more sense to me but I suppose the money is in Europe.

Hardball

Go Phillies! Wake me when the World Series is over. I hope Pedro, wins a game and the Yankees go down in flames.

"I have a problem."

In other baseball news, Steve Philips, recently canned ESPN baseball announcer has checked himself into a treatment facility to address his issues.

Phillips’s representative, said in an e-mail his client “is voluntarily admitting himself to an inpatient treatment facility to address his personal issues, and informed ESPN of his plans Friday.-ESPN

What exactly are your issues Steve? Serial adultery? Stupidity?

Step one in celebrity damage control, go to rehab.

MMA

I gave UFC, a shot last night. Lyoto “The Dragon” Machida was fighting Mauricio “Shogun” Rua at the Staples Center in Los Angeles. Frankly, I was bored. There just wasn't that much action. A kick here and kick there followed by some hugging and tugging with some close range punching and kicking. Seeing Michael Clark Duncan ringside and David Spade hoisting a solo cup and a nip of Jack Daniels was the highlight for me.