reviews

Everybody has an opinion. I'm starting a list of funny online reviews:

"Oh yeah - reviewer Janitor X is a complete moron. He also gave Pavement's Crooked Rain and the Pixies Doolittle album one star.
He's one of those idiots you see driving a datsun pickup blaring Mastadon out the window. It must be weird to be retarded but not know it, huh?"

"Every time I here the song 'Superman', I feel like I've been hit with kryptonite, or even like I just wuss out on a fight with a kid still in diapers, or even just feel real weak, maybe that's the whole point, hell I don't know, because he just sings it too damn high, almost like the way Coldplay sings 'Fix You', don't like it, not normal, grow some cohoanies for crying out loud. But since I have this album (even though I inherited it from an ex-friend, as you notice I said ex-friend), and don't want to butt-hurt the rest of the crowd here I gave it 3 stars, probally too late, oh well."

"Good Old Boys" is also a great record to drink to. Just as my friend Myles. He is a killer diller from the dirty dirty. Myles is hard into "Cougars" (women over the age of 40), huffing gasoline, books on tape, big jungle cats, paintings of race cars, and hanging out without his shirt on. He is a no-nonsense kind of dude. I am pretty sure you can find Myles hanging out in his San Francisco apartment shirtless right now with a mean scotch buzz, the body of a decomposing bobcat or lynx in his basement fridge, a 46 year old woman chained to his staircase, and Randy Newman's "Good Old Boys" blasting at an uncomfortable volume from his alarm clock/CD player.



One listent to "Never too Much" and how could you not agree:

Vandross, of course, was the reigning king of '80s R&B romance; while he was never as troubled as Marvin Gaye or as downright eccentric as Al Green, he did have that voice. Before hip-hop split the audience generationally, it was the favored accompaniment to seduction for many fans, whose number grew even greater when 1986's "Stop to Love" pushed him through the pop-crossover barrier once and for all. Greatest Hits summarizes the days when he ruled the world.